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Showing posts with the label blessings

Mom: I Always Knew I’d Miss You . . .

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Mom, I guess I did know when I stood on this same porch all those years ago, and I took commemorative photos in the yard July 25, 1990, I would never live at this address or in the same town as you for the rest of my life.  I guess I had somehow thought I’d counted the cost of spreading my wings and taking flight. Your 23 plus years preceding that moment — of loving me, teaching me, chiding me, disciplining me, laughing with me, and guiding me had attempted to prepare me for whatever I’d face once I stepped off that porch as a full time resident of your home. I guess I thought I was ready for the many years of phone calls, cards you learned to make yourself, occasional surprise care packages, short visits to wherever I’d moved to next, and the ever-heart-in-my-throat moments with my bladder fairly bursting as I always made those last 100 or so miles to your house at breakneck speed, because I couldn't bear to make another potty stop when I knew the Louisville

How Long?

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I went on a biblical spelunking expotition ( think Winnie the Pooh and Christopher Robin ) this morning. I was looking for David’s plea of “how long”. I knew he’d raised it, because I know David throughout the Psalms is oh so much like me. In my quest for the verse pictured, I scampered among these other gems: “Why do the nations rage and the peoples plot in vain?” Psalm 2:1 “You have given me relief when I was in distress. Be gracious to me and hear my prayer!” Psalm 4:1b “Give ear to my words, O LORD; consider my groaning.” Psalm 5:1 “My soul also is greatly troubled. But You, O LORD—how long? Turn, O LORD, deliver my life; save me for the sake of Your steadfast love . . .” Psalm 6:3   “Why, O LORD, do You hide Yourself in times of trouble?” Psalm 10:1  More confirmation of what the Spirit has been impressing on my heart all week. I am not alone in my  anxiety, in my pleas for answers, in my groanings, in my questions, in my confusion, or my wondering where God is in

Homeschooling?! You CAN Do This . . . and So Much More

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“ What’s on my mind?” Facebook poses this question; the following is my answer in long form. All the people freaking out over “homeschooling “. I’m not going to cover every perspective here, because I am well aware of the myriad of different situations going on in the millions of homes around this country that got the news their children will now be home for possibly the next MONTH. What I am specifically going to address are those of you who are able to have one or both parents at home during the day — especially those of you who are full time educators in some capacity of young elementary-aged students. First, if you are NOT a professional educator, remind yourself of this every morning when you look in that mirror and wipe the toothpaste spit off your bottom lip: “I taught my own kid to brush his or her teeth all by myself.” Next go help that same kid or kids to make some breakfast: cold cereal, instant oatmeal, a toaster waffle, or pancakes if you’re feeling ambitio

SLOW: Writing Challenge Day 5 with hope*writers

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“For still the vision awaits its appointed time; it hastens to the end—it will not lie. If it seems slow , wait for it; it will surely come; it will not delay.” Habakkuk‬ ‭2:3‬ ‭ESV‬‬ God cannot be rushed. I get impatient at least once a day. Okay. Probably more often than that, especially if any of my day involves being behind the wheel and sharing the road with “slow” motorists. Without Jesus, I’d probably be a pretty rage-filled driver. With Him, I still beep my horn more frequently than some. All that to say . . . though I’m not one to like things to go slow; God has His own timetable. Let’s take  the pace of my healing post-divorce. I gave myself a bit for that. You know . . . a few months should have taken care of it, right?  I was married for more than 20 years, so an extended school-length vacation should have whipped me right back into shape, ready to tackle all things new?!?! As you can most likely guess, it has been quite a SLOW process instead. Patterns of thinki

Thursday Thanks Tank

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( a time to intentionally redirect my gaze & give testimony to the ways God blesses me each week) I have been keenly aware of how my attitude may shift in new season beginning this week. Though I had no clue when I walked out the door of my former job that I would spend the next almost four months under-employed and awaiting God's provision in an up close and personal fashion I'd experienced almost exactly two years ago -- I can now draw comparisons and contrasts in how that time was oh so different from its counterpart. Those musings may show up in another post soon, but let's get right to the focus of this post -- THANKFULNESS.  How has God been faithfully filling my tank? Providing me with a fantastic job as the nanny of a sweet baby boy and his older brother, who is in pre-K. I get to spend my days singing, reading board books that I remember all too well from my days as a mama to the pre-talking crowd, and taking strolls around the neighb

God Winks

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GOD WINKS. What are they? A "God wink" is anything that comes your way out of the ordinary, or any unexplainable circumstance designed to delight and bring joy. We are His beloved, and He delights in giving us good gifts. I'm not exactly sure who coined the term, but I've been routinely using it to describe those treats in my days that I point right back to my Abba Father, who I am sure must wink just like my earthly Daddy does when he does something extra special or outlandishly sweet. In the photo to the left is an example of a God wink. Let me give you a little back story, my dearest friend on this earth, Mary Lou , is a jewelry designer for jBloom Designs . Each year she goes to their national conference. Recently she was there and waiting at the end of a long line to score some specials available only to designers. The item pictured was a pre-customized bracelet--isn't that amazing!?! She took one look at it and knew it needed to be mine. God wi

Thursday Thanks Tank

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( a time to intentionally redirect my gaze and give testimony to the ways God blesses me) Good Thursday morning, all! Some weeks feel like a blip between Sunday and Thursday. This is one of those weeks where I'm not quite sure where the time slipped away, but I definitely feel like the speed was accelerated. Let's dive right in to how God is filling my tank: Provision and sources of income that could only come from Him. Relying on the Lord strengthens my faith and gives me reasons to intentionally take my hands off my circumstances. Dog sitting for my daughter. The year-plus without Shelby has been heart-wrenching at times, and having Ava here fills a void for a small window. Painting and setting up an online store for my art. It's a learning curve, but the results will be exciting on so many levels. More to come on that front! Processing opportunities and decisions with my dearest bosom friend. There is nothing like hoping and dreaming with so

Perfectly Imperfect

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I've mentioned and featured this beautiful visitor a couple of times already. I am all about the tiny ways God chooses to bless me and try to find tangible, daily reminders of His care for me in the tiniest of ways.  I am always on the lookout for what I've termed "God winks". These are ways I feel like He  shows me how tenderly He seeks out ways to delight me with His goodness. On a couple of especially lonely days last week, He sent this beauty to hang around my front steps, clinging to the standing phlox my precious daughter planted there last summer. I spent at least 20 minutes with my phone poised and ready to capture the fluttering and dancing of my unexpected guest. I turned it on "live" mode and caught quite a few shots of her in action. I held the button down and sent "bursts" of her careening from petal to petal. She was in the midst of my amateurish photo shoot and had no clue.  She is pretty from all angles, but w

Eighteen Years

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Eighteen years. Yes, it takes 18 years for that newborn to officially be declared an "adult", but I'm referring to another group of years heavy on my heart today. For the past 18 years in a row I have joined the throngs of other mamas on the first day of school. My news feed today is loaded with smiling faces, new clothes, new backpacks, lunch boxes, and my absolute favorite -- a brand new box of crayons! School starts early here in my area, and though we are far, far away from a real seasonal "Fall"-- summer is effectively over for so many. Though it's been many, many more years since I participated in the back to school frenzy as a student, I cannot lie that I got butterflies in my stomach every single night before the first day of school for my three for the past 18 years. I sit here this morning in a very different place in almost two decades. I have no one starting school. I have no new backpack in front of my door waiting to be scooped u

Faith Or Fear

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Some days are just like that, aren't they? You know the ones. You wake up simultaneously whispering "Jesus" and "what in the world am I going to do?" in the same ragged breath. You long to spout faithful treatises and flowery expressions of God's sovereignty. Yet all that comes out is a puff of empty air. You don't know what to pray. You don't know what else to say. Your neck hurts from hunkering down and pushing on through. Your sleep is sporadic, because though you said you'd leave it in the capable hands of the Lord; you've conjured up a thousand ways you could try to fix it all by yourself in the inky blackness of the night. You balance the desire for the darkness to stay like a comfortable invisibility cloak and an eagerness for the dawn to break and relieve you from all those night time tangle of thoughts that send the morning racing ahead without rest for your soul. "What comes with this new day?" you hesitantl

Called to Remember . . . Or Not?

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REMEMBER We are called to remember. God considered the concept of remembering so important He referenced it no less than 150 times in the Old and New Testaments combined. The verse in question today turns the idea of "remembering" on its head and cautions us what NOT to remember. "Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old." Isaiah 43:18 ESV I'm taking this one to mean don't dwell on the past. It's okay to remember it but don't stay there. Don't fixate on the things of old. Learn from it. Let it give you wisdom for your future self. The following quote struck me as I have been forcing myself to go back as far as I can remember, to get back to that little Pam who was unblemished by years of mistakes, missteps, and misremembering (I guess that really is a word!): "Children will not remember you for the material things you provided but for the feeling that you cherished them." Richard L. Evans  I find

Thursday Thanks Tank

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Hey y'all! It's Thursday already or Thursday finally, depending on your perspective. Either way, it is Thursday, and you know what that means.  Let's take a moment for: ( a time to intentionally redirect my gaze and give testimony to the ways God blesses me)  Sometimes this practice flows right off the fingers and onto the screen. Other times it is a sacrifice of praise.  Whichever it is for you today, know He accepts it gladly and is glorified in it when you intentionally redirect your gaze to give testimony to what your friend, Jesus, is doing in your life. He gets the accolades, and we are all blessed in the process. So, how is God filling my tank this week? My friend Jennie . We have met through hope*writers , and I would have joined just to meet her. You can find her on Instagram @theweekleyconnection. You need to start following her, because she's got great wisdom to share and will encourage your heart. But that aside, she had a fa

Angels Among Us

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I've been painting angels lately. My mind and my paintbrush have been consumed with them. I'm not sure if the increase in my thoughts about angels has been in tandem with the recent loneliness I've felt, but I have certainly stepped up my study of them in Scripture. Angels are among us. Scripture confirms this over and over. Sometimes they are named. Sometimes they are part of a "heavenly host." God sent His messages through an angel multiple times throughout both the Old and New Testaments. My paintings and my studies are certainly not the end-all, be-all representation of what a biblical angel might be, but they are what I have been inspired to scrawl out on canvas. When it came time for God to make His most important announcement ever, to begin the story of redemption for all of us, He chose to send the angel, Gabriel, to Mary. Let's take a moment and step back into that scene: " And he came to her and said, 'Greetings, O favored o

Thursday Thanks Tank

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( a time to intentionally redirect my gaze and give testimony to the ways God blesses me) How is God filling my tank this week?  Providing in ways I can only attribute to Him. People are praying, and He is answering in His time and in His own fashion. Through creation. Being a part of the team at AR Workshop Rome is a joy and an outlet for leaving a trail of beauty each time I cross the threshold.  Being treated to a movie with my son. We had a great time at this one yesterday. Having time to explore some of my favorite things. I've been painting, sewing, and writing. All pursuits that bring me joy and set my soul at rest. My weighted blanket from Mosaic Weighted Blankets . I've had mine for about six months now, and it has made a world of difference in my sleep habits. Not only is mine pretty, but it provides me with a comfort level I had forgotten I could have during a night's sleep. I even drag it out to the sofa if I'm taking a nap. Relief f

Silence: A Lesson In Repetition

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God gets my attention through repetition. How about you? What I am continuing to discover in my almost four-decade "expotition" with my friend Jesus is He knows I don't usually get His lessons for me the first go-round. He repeats. He puts out virtual road signs.  Sometimes He puts out literal road signs to garner my attention and my gaze. He has specific Scripture rise to the surface again and again. He puts a word in my path and writes it in all capital letters EVERYWHERE so I can't possibly miss it. Silence has been the most recent. Jesus gave me almost a month of an empty nest to foster an atmosphere of solitude and silence. He has brought any number of lessons across my path to reinforce His message for this season.  My life has been filled with noise outside my head for decades and self-imposed noise for far longer. How do I avoid silence? How do you? Music Television Internet surfing Reaching out to others rather

Thursday Thanks Tank

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( a time to intentionally redirect my gaze and give testimony to the ways God blesses me) How is God filling my tank this week?  I am serving at VBS for the first time in eight years, and it has been a true pleasure. My crafty heart is in its element amongst paint, glue, crayons, colored pasta, and pom poms. I've met some wonderful ladies who have served alongside me, and we have shared the message that no matter what comes their way -- at age 3, 4, or 5 -- God is good. The same is true for me. When life isn't fair . . . God is good! When life is scary . . . God is good! When life changes . . . God is good! When life is sad . . . God is good! When life is good . . . God is good! Life DOES get wild, and through it all . . . God is GOOD!  I am thankful to have friends who will vouch for me on a moment's notice. The depth of friendship is boundless, and I am blessed beyond measure in longevity and quality. Summer breezes. I am so thankful for the early morning

Thursday Thanks Tank

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( a time to intentionally redirect my gaze and give testimony to the ways God blesses me) How is God filling my tank this week?  • Driving:  After a week of being driven around or being home bound, I have enjoyed the freedom of taking myself places on my own time schedule  • Donating : always feels good to clean things out and give away what I don’t use or need anymore  • Dessert: this week was apple cranberry—still using up all the extra cranberries I bought and froze back at Thanksgiving. Yummy.  • Healing : so amazed all the time at how God knit us together in the first place and how He crafted us to heal after an illness or surgery • Dining: I had lunch with both of my daughters, at their house! They were great hostesses and served a delicious meal. • Discernment: moments of clarity in the midst of lots of blurry. Grateful God is giving me peeks into what He’s doing.  Have a beautiful Thursday, my lovely friends!  Please let me know how