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Showing posts with the label pondering

Be Kind

BE KIND ____________________________ I have a pattern. When crisis comes, whether it be personal or nationwide, I begin mulling things over, measuring my response, weighing my words, contemplating what I may have to add to the noise, the frenzy, the quick responders who sometimes speak and then think. I’ve often chided myself for not being “quick on my feet” when it comes to arguing or taking a stand. Yet I know God created me this way for a reason. My words can be like a whip. I have a veritable vocabulary-stocked Arsenal, and without thinking I can cause bomb-like damage when I choose to shoot off those words without wisdom leading the charge. I have hurt plenty who have crossed my path, but the years have been kind and taught me much. KIND (a four-letter word) One we all should practice more daily. When I don’t have the words I’d like to express at times, I turn to those who do. The following is from @holleygerth in her book #fiercehearted: “We aren’t called to be NICE. (also a four

How Long?

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I went on a biblical spelunking expotition ( think Winnie the Pooh and Christopher Robin ) this morning. I was looking for David’s plea of “how long”. I knew he’d raised it, because I know David throughout the Psalms is oh so much like me. In my quest for the verse pictured, I scampered among these other gems: “Why do the nations rage and the peoples plot in vain?” Psalm 2:1 “You have given me relief when I was in distress. Be gracious to me and hear my prayer!” Psalm 4:1b “Give ear to my words, O LORD; consider my groaning.” Psalm 5:1 “My soul also is greatly troubled. But You, O LORD—how long? Turn, O LORD, deliver my life; save me for the sake of Your steadfast love . . .” Psalm 6:3   “Why, O LORD, do You hide Yourself in times of trouble?” Psalm 10:1  More confirmation of what the Spirit has been impressing on my heart all week. I am not alone in my  anxiety, in my pleas for answers, in my groanings, in my questions, in my confusion, or my wondering where God is in

BEHOLD the Beloved

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With so much time to think, I have been pondering and avoiding the pondering. How about you? Are you using this time to dig deep into your own soul and your inherent motivations for why you even do life the way you’ve chosen to do it? Are you asking yourself the tough questions? Delving into your own psyche and seeing how a time like this pandemic unveils the best and worst of who we are at our very cores? To be perfectly honest and keep this post gut-level real at its very ugliest, I have spent far more time contemplating my next quarantine snack than my core motivations. I’ve been self-focused on my own allergy-provoked sniffles and what they might mean beyond the seasonal pollen-ridden air, instead of seeking to check my heart and why I care so much about so many things that truly matter little in the grand scheme of who God created me to be in the first place. I have scrolled and jumped from one report to the next, one meme to the next, one complaining tirade to the nex

Ache is Not Equal

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Following another prompt challenge this week to keep my thoughts flowing and try to be more consistent in posting. I’m a couple days behind on this one hosted by @meredith_mcdaniel, but the Lord has insisted I do NOT overlook or scoot by this first one: ACHE. First off in my head is this—ACHE does not equal pain. Let’s unpack a bit of that thought with the following quote leading the way. “Pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our consciences, but shouts in our pains. It is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.”   ―  C.S. Lewis A dear friend of mine messaged me this morning and mentioned a couple of different directions I could travel with “ache” as my prompt. She noted both my physical aches as well as that perspective of my heart ache. Using the Lewis quote above, I experience God using the daily ache of my body, driven by a 2001 diagnosis of fibromyalgia, to remind me how dependent I am on Him just to swing my legs over the

By Name

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I can go days without hearing my name. Does that ever happen to you? You spend your entire day never hearing your name called by anyone. I have two names I routinely am called these days. Pam, of course, and Mama or Mom (used only by my son). Yet in the course of many of my days in this season, I am addressed as nothing.  Oh, I exchange words with my son, but he doesn't necessarily call me by name. He knows who I am, and we fall into conversations without addressing and using each other's given names. I share pleasantries with the people at ALDI, and while I use the names of those I know -- they are not obligated, nor do many of them know my given name. I can slip through my day without ever hearing my name aloud. A bit disconcerting now that I've allowed my mind to drift there. It doesn't change who I am or make me question my value as a person. It is . . . maybe just a reason for pause. Do I do the same thing with the Lord? Do I wake up and begin

Eighteen Years

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Eighteen years. Yes, it takes 18 years for that newborn to officially be declared an "adult", but I'm referring to another group of years heavy on my heart today. For the past 18 years in a row I have joined the throngs of other mamas on the first day of school. My news feed today is loaded with smiling faces, new clothes, new backpacks, lunch boxes, and my absolute favorite -- a brand new box of crayons! School starts early here in my area, and though we are far, far away from a real seasonal "Fall"-- summer is effectively over for so many. Though it's been many, many more years since I participated in the back to school frenzy as a student, I cannot lie that I got butterflies in my stomach every single night before the first day of school for my three for the past 18 years. I sit here this morning in a very different place in almost two decades. I have no one starting school. I have no new backpack in front of my door waiting to be scooped u

Called to Remember . . . Or Not?

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REMEMBER We are called to remember. God considered the concept of remembering so important He referenced it no less than 150 times in the Old and New Testaments combined. The verse in question today turns the idea of "remembering" on its head and cautions us what NOT to remember. "Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old." Isaiah 43:18 ESV I'm taking this one to mean don't dwell on the past. It's okay to remember it but don't stay there. Don't fixate on the things of old. Learn from it. Let it give you wisdom for your future self. The following quote struck me as I have been forcing myself to go back as far as I can remember, to get back to that little Pam who was unblemished by years of mistakes, missteps, and misremembering (I guess that really is a word!): "Children will not remember you for the material things you provided but for the feeling that you cherished them." Richard L. Evans  I find

Angels Among Us

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I've been painting angels lately. My mind and my paintbrush have been consumed with them. I'm not sure if the increase in my thoughts about angels has been in tandem with the recent loneliness I've felt, but I have certainly stepped up my study of them in Scripture. Angels are among us. Scripture confirms this over and over. Sometimes they are named. Sometimes they are part of a "heavenly host." God sent His messages through an angel multiple times throughout both the Old and New Testaments. My paintings and my studies are certainly not the end-all, be-all representation of what a biblical angel might be, but they are what I have been inspired to scrawl out on canvas. When it came time for God to make His most important announcement ever, to begin the story of redemption for all of us, He chose to send the angel, Gabriel, to Mary. Let's take a moment and step back into that scene: " And he came to her and said, 'Greetings, O favored o