Leaving A Trail of Beauty

( a time to intentionally redirect my gaze and give testimony to the ways God blesses me) How is God filling my tank this week?  • Driving:  After a week of being driven around or being home bound, I have enjoyed the freedom of taking myself places on my own time schedule  • Donating : always feels good to clean things out and give away what I don’t use or need anymore  • Dessert: this week was apple cranberry—still using up all the extra cranberries I bought and froze back at Thanksgiving. Yummy.  • Healing : so amazed all the time at how God knit us together in the first place and how He crafted us to heal after an illness or surgery • Dining: I had lunch with both of my daughters, at their house! They were great hostesses and served a delicious meal. • Discernment: moments of clarity in the midst of lots of blurry. Grateful God is giving me peeks into what He’s doing.  Have a beautiful Thursday, my lovely friends!  Please let me know how

Any morning people out there? You know the type. They bounce out of bed with eager anticipation of what lies ahead, a smile already on their lips, words quick to follow. Coherent phrases, goals assembled, an agenda to be conquered. Or maybe you're more like this: you set the alarms on your phone . . . for 6:00, 6:05, 6:15, 6:20, 6:30, 7:00, then you hit the snooze on that last one until you absolutely have to stumble out of the bed, drag yourself to the coffee pot, and hope today you remembered to put the coffee beans in the grinder before dropping them directly into your favorite coffee mug. I fall somewhere in the middle of that second shot. I inherently am NOT a morning person. I admit I've missed all too many sunrises in favor of few more minutes communing with my pillow. I have made the mistake of putting unground coffee beans in the coffee maker, only to realize my morning brew has far less appeal if I'm expected to chew it. However, all joking aside, I am fi

So yesterday's verse was about calling on the Lord. (Psalm 145:18) I mentioned at the end of my short post that it's a conversation. A little fact I routinely forget when it comes to my relationship with Jesus.  Let's trek back a few years to my initial call out to Him. I was drawn to the Lord listening to a guest speaker at youth group retreat a couple of weeks after my 14th birthday. I managed to hear God's tender whisper in the midst of playing goofy games like "Sardines", singing the likes of  "Pass It On" and an early Amy Grant favorite  "My Father's Eyes" , and stuffing ourselves with the first of many batches of  peanut butter "retreat" fudge my mom made for more than ten years of such events. If I'm really honest, I don't think I fully got the picture of what I had done until much later. I took some tiny baby steps. I started reading my Bible. I went to youth group, church, choir, bell choir, and e

Sometimes change comes slowly and almost imperceptibly. It can take years for a transformation to be noticed or observed. Other times change whirls in like a hurricane and leaves nothing in its path the same. Change can seem sudden to the observer and yet be completely embraced by the one who enacts the change and needs to leave certain things behind. Read -- I have been doing lots of changing behind the scenes that no one really saw. Except my children, who had a front row seat for ALL of it. Even the days when I burst into tears in the lunch meat section of Kroger or completely lost my cool when a Kenny Chesney song came on the Pandora shuffle. Over the past couple of yea rs, I have gone through the most transforming change of my entire life. I set in motion the ending of a marriage of two + decades, one I had committed to in front of family and friends.  I left what had become a toxic atmosphere in every area: physically, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and financial

Awakened early this morning with a combination of chaotic sounds drilling a veritable drum beat in my head. The bondage to coffee is awakening a beast within and the mixed tape tripping inside my brain simultaneously crows "Jesus, Name Above All Names" and Katy Perry's "Hot 'n Cold" , of all things. I try to squelch the second in favor of the first, all the while reminding myself whose I am and that fear need not be my master . . . again today. The sweat pours, I right myself on the only side that doesn't send shooting pains, and I am jarred into full consciousness with my heart in my throat and its wildly tapping an oddly mingled tempo. What is already true today? I am unemployed. I am 52. My son did not graduate last night with his classmates. My daughters do not live under my roof anymore. I am an artist. I am divorced. I am in pain. Constant pain. I am still a believer in spite of all that threatens to cause me to stray. I am sinful. I am fallible.